What It’s Like to Have ADHD

25 Things About ADHD

I will start off by explaining that the reason I’m writing this article is because I made the decision to order a triple espresso at 7pm tonight. It is now 12:47am. Perhaps the caffeine should be worn off, but perhaps not. Perhaps it is the caffeine, but perhaps it is the worry that it is the caffeine.

Now I choose to recite a list:

1. Always in a hurry, never on time. 

When I was a kid, I used to ask my mom, “why are you in such a hurry?” Her answer was, “I’m always in a hurry.” I replied, “Oh that’s…why.”

2. Constant frustration.

ADHDers are prone to perfectionism.

This gives us ample opportunity for obsessive reflection or if you’re like me, temper tantrums.

3. Impulsivity.

Losing weight is nice and all, but that could take weeks, maybe months! And I want a strawberries & cream frappucino with chocolate chips and whipped cream NOW.

Q: But isn’t that-

A: No no, you listen to me, voice of reason: Strawberries. It’s probably good for me.

*ONE HOUR LATER*

A: Ick, I don’t feel so good. I feel kinda bloaty. Maybe that frappucino wasn’t such a good idea.

*ONE DAY LATER*

Losing weight is nice and all, but that could take weeks, maybe months! And I want a strawberries & cream frappucino with chocolate chips and whipped cream NOW.

Q: …

4. Inability to stick to a routine.

Take probiotics twice a day for stomach problems = Take probiotics once every two days, or whatever works best for you.

5. Constant frustration, part 2.

My tummy hurts.

6. Feeling overwhelmed.

I don’t even know where to begin with this one, there are so many things. NEXT.

7. Getting other people to read things for me.

I’m actually illiterate. I have a totally cute helper-monkey who types up my blog posts for me. He loves the Simpsons. This finally explains the pictures.

When I’m at a restaurant I sometimes get Joel to read the menu to me. I actually blame the menu for being super dense and looking like War & Peace.

If they can accomodate the vegetarians, why can’t they accomodate me and have a Cole’s Notes version?

8. People not believing me or people minimizing my problem.

Cindy: Just an FYI, I have Tourettes so please don’t take offense if I swear.

People: HAHAHAHAHA, oh Cindy, you SLAY ME.

Cindy: Hehe, yep. I’m pretty funny! But yeah, I really do have Tourettes.

People: Seriously? Oh man, oh gosh I’m so sorry!

~OR~

Cindy: Just an FYI I have ADHD. Sometimes I get frustrated when I try to concentrate.

People: That’s nice, dear.

9. Blurting out stuff.

I generally have a good filter for inappropriateness, unless it’s hilarious, then I can’t stop myself and you can’t stop me. Never tell me hilarious secrets.

10. Sugar and caffeine addiction. 

Ages 8 to 16: Coca-Cola

Ages 16 to 19: Iced Cappucino

Ages 19 to present day: Espresso drizzled on oreo ice cream.

11. Obsessions.

Cindy: Hello Friend, are you free Saturday?

Friend: (in shower, not texting back)

Cindy: Omg, if I don’t find out in the next 3 seconds, I’m going to completely forget that I was trying to plan something and the Universe along with all its baby huskies will be destroyed!

12. Anxiety. 

The driving force behind my very being.

13. Unfinished Novels.

The Restaurant at the End of the Universe – Douglas Adams

Who is Bugs Potter? – Gordon Korman

14: Unfinished Non-Fiction.

The Guns of August – Barbara Tuchman

Cooking with Potatoes – Jenny Stacey

The Everything Health Guide to Adult ADD/ADHD – various authors

15. Finished Non-Fiction.

He’s Just Not That Into You

Assorted Foxtrot

16. Finished graphic novel serieses:

Scott Pilgrim. They are a thousand times better than the movie.

Gotta catch 'em all

17. The mind chattering away with a thousand thoughts at once. 

Please see the Simpsons episode entitled: “The Mysterious Voyage of Our Homer”

18. Interest in things fleeting. 

Goodbye my lover. Goodbye my friend. You have been the project I started a week ago and forgot about.

19. Impatience.

"When I'm kicking you, that means hurry up!"

20. Last but not least, difficulty concentrating on tasks that require mental effort unless I am angry enough to finally do it. 

Dishes make me angry.

21. Fear of success. (Oops, I kept going)

Friend: Have you tried using timers to help you manage your time?

Cindy: That’s preposterous!

Friend: Are you sure? Because I find-

Cindy: Nope.

22. Pushing the wrong buttons.

Instructions are for wusses. Pushing random buttons until this copier/bank machine/computer program makes me a latte is my plan for the next half hour.

23. Identifying with Fry from Futurama.

I'm getting a headache with pictures.

24. Sitting in my cubicle at work, wishing I could go outside and frolic.

Weekend comes: Better Off Ted marathon.

25. Creative Minded.

I don’t mind this one so much.